J42

When i first decided to post jokes on my blog, i also decided that i had to set down a few rules

no disgusting stuff
no making fun of gays and lesbians
no stereotypes
and no swearing

...i gave up

J41

Science tells that we all come from the Africans from Africa
That's also where our coolness comes from

J40

This is for all the kids who watch the World Cup and get inspired to play soccer
here are the minimum requirements:

1. ANYONE CAN PLAY NO MATTER WHAT RACE OR GENDER...but prefer male Latino
   
2. A GAME FOR DISABLED PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO ARMS......but prefer that you have arms anyways
3. thickness of skull: 1 ft
   

J39

One of the only reason i'm watching the World Cup is that there is no loud Mexican commentary

FIFA World Cup in South Afr - OH SH*T!!! THE BRITISH IS COMING!!!!!

FIFA World Cup
it has finally come
After four long years
since it's last game....and i don't really care

well to be honest
i'm like the rest of the world
i don't care about a sport unless my favorite team makes it to the playoffs or there is a world tournament...except for the Wimbledon and the French open
i like tennis but since these competitions happen like every year, i kinda get bored
it's not like the Olympic where they make the country work for 4 years and make the rest of the world wait for 4 years
like last time during the Beijing Olympics, when i was watching the kayaking, i was like "whoa look at that paddle work"

and the last time i went kayaking...i hated it

anyways
onto the most anticipated game for the two most classical rivals
USA VS BRITAIN

that's why my blog is like
it was the only thing relevant to this game
for some reason blogger doesn't have a "sports categories" in their templates
o well

you know i think that it would a b**ch slap for Britain if they don't win
there will be two slap in the face for Britain i think

slap no. 1: if they don't win
slap no. 2: they haven't won since like some half century ago....and they invented the sport

if Britain was a mom, US would be the disappointing child
now i don't know too much about soccer or anything so i can't give you any soccer facts or say who's gonna win
but i can imagine Britain's pep talk before the game

Coach: ok now WE ARE NOT GONNA LET THOSE YANKS WIN!!!!!

player: wait i thought we already got over that?

Coach: H-H-HELLL NO!

now aside from competition that hasn't been aired yet

i have to say Nelson Mandela looks like Morgan Freeman

and as i am typing this...there is a pre-match
now what is that?
seriously i don't know
do the players have to get tired before they get tired?

last night there was the Kick Off Celebration with all the world renowned singers
and i have to say...the black eyed peas don't sound good live
it was just outa tune
but the ones that did sound good were Alicia Keys and Shakira

for this game
for the FIFA world cup
all the networks that aren't broadcasting the world cup, they are gonna loose views

for this game
for the FIFA world cup
McDonalds is the official restaurant
and for all the teams, they are saying...damn no wonder we lost last time

god it's hard to watch TV and type at the same time

o well
GAMES GONNA BEGIN
GONNA WATCH


ps
when did South Korea play soccer

J38

One time I entered into a youth art contest and I won. I got really excited because it includes a certificate and a medal.

So when i was basking in my glory, some kid goes up to me and says "you'll never be as good as da Vinci. and he was dyslexic! you'll never be as good as the people with disabilities who have to face challenges everyday of their LIFE!"

And i was like WHAT? Are you hating on me because i'm not disable? Don't you know the rules of real life?

the next time somebody makes fun of me because i'm not disabled, is the time when Mexicans take over the United States.

Ending Version 2:

And i was like WHAT? DID HUMAN RIGHTS ACTIVISTS FINALLY GET RECOGNISED?

ENDING VERSION 3:

the next time somebody is hating on me because i'm not disabled is the time where whites are a minority.

J37

I once got into an argument (i can't say "a fight") with a guy in a wheelchair

3 mins into this argument and i got beat up by the people watching around

i've learned my lesson

no matter how much disabled people make fun of you, you can't say a word about them